the dummies' guide to reviewing  Ever gotten to a fic and were a loss of words as to what to say? Or how long that review should be? Here's some tips to help. 1. State your couple preference several times or more. This will help the author decide, if undecided, what couple bias to show. Never mind if neither characters have made an entrance or even been mentioned, it's still good for the author to know their readers like this or that. 2. "Continue" is a perfectly good review to leave. It lets the author know that you are interested and intrigued by their story. It does all this with that one tiny word. 3. If a subcouple bothers you, let them know! Fixate on that and only that. They may only be mentioned in passing, but it lets them know what you believe is important. 4. Dwell on the little things. I mean the author hasn't explained this yet, it must mean they simply forgot about it. They'll be so grateful! It's not like they weren't planning on incorporating it later on or anything... 5. Don't bother making sure your complaints are founded. I mean if you didn't see it the first time, it must not be there. 6. When you read a fic that revolves around a couple you don't like, and the author warned you ahead of time, go ahead and review it spouting your hatred for that couple. The author only needs to see the "light" after all. 7. If you read the first part of the story and hated it and had let the author know, then go ahead read and review the second part with the same exact comments! You'll get their arses away from your fic board if it's the last thing you do. 8. Just read an AU or future, and ::gasp:: the characters are hardly like they are shown on TV (and you know that you are the absolute expert on the show, duh!) then flame 'em. God forbid if it's not a carbon copy of the dialogue from the show. It's not like circumstances and situations actually change who people are. 9. Always, always tell someone they suck without citing why you didn't like it. That two worded phrase "u suck!" will tell the author all they need to know about what to improve upon. (Courtesy of ChristineCS.) 10. Even after the author has made it clear by the length spent on a coupling on a fic that there are going to be no other pairings, suggest that the author turn it into a story for your shipper group by putting in a double date scene, even though the author only mentions other characters in passing. (Courtesy of Nate the Liza-Phile) 11. The fact that authors have personal lives should not prevent you from begging for updates! Just found out that a story you like hasn't been updated for a while because there was a death in the author's family? No worries! Simply post a review saying that you're "dying" to find out what happens, and the author will get right on it! (Courtesy of Angel Grace)